The Latch

I SCREACHED

“The natural power of breastfeeding is one of the greatest wonders of the world. It is about real love. It is about caring and celebrating the wondrous joy of nurturing a new life. It is about enjoying being a woman.”

-Anwar Fazal

in pain! What they don’t tell you about breastfeeding is that: it’s HARD and it’s painful (at times). Baby boy snuggled up to my bosom after the usual fight…you know fists clenched, punching the air, quick head shakes from left to right. Then, finally, he latched! “OUCH!” I shrieked! I didn’t anticipate such a loud scream, nor did I anticipate such a large clamp down onto my breast! Either the boy was starving or this is the way it’s actually supposed to feel. Either way, it was anything but comfortable.

Each day, as it relates to breastfeeding, is very different. On day 1, I was in despair. I could not get my baby to latch, instantly crushing my glamorous  dreams of keeping my baby all natural through breastfeeding. The lactation consultants tried everything, from shoving the breast into his mouth (“breast sandwich” is what they called it… … …) to giving me a hand pump, later graduating to the grand hospital grade electric pump. They even gave me a nipple shield & tried to lure baby onto my breast by releasing small similac droplets onto my nipple. It wasn’t until I finally came home from the hospital that my boyfriend and I determined the one and only guarantee: the nipple shield!! I, admit, I thought it was dumb at first. I also viewed it as hazardous as I thought the baby could suffocate with the piece of plastic hovering both my breast and his face. 

In this moment, however, I’m extremely grateful that it was offered as an option. He pulls milk and falls out in a “milk wasted” coma when he’s done. It isn’t always enough but it’s a start.